I always pictured it differently when I was a
kid. The poor soul trying to scrape up enough money together to buy
drugs instead finds a compassionate Christian who, in a half hour
show convinces her to give her heart to the Lord. At that
precise moment come rays of sunshine down upon her head from Heaven as
this pathetic life beneath it is changed forever in a single
instant.
There were no drugs, no ray of sunshine
over my head, no "aha moment" and my life was pretty much the same for some
time afterward. My testimony is a process, a journey. Mine was
a methodical and logical series of questions and answers, nagging feelings and a
few significant moments that eventually and most completely changed the purpose
and course of my life.
I was raised by two
Atheists of Jewish heritage, married a non practicing Catholic and became a non
denominational Christian due, in part, to some Amway meetings and a Jehovah's
Witness who came to my door. I know. I need to explain...
I never did any drugs. Never even tried
cigarettes. I never hung around with a bad crowd. Never did much
rebelling. I was a good kid. I just didn't know Jesus. I was raised
in a home where I was told only silly or ignorant people believe in some unseen
being. Smart, independent people didn't need to believe in a God that
would save them because they could take care of themselves. I never was an
Atheist. I always felt there was something beyond what I could see and I began
looking for it very early in life. I
interviewed all my friends about their religious beliefs. I asked what
they believed, what the traditions meant and why they felt their beliefs were
true. I found the traditions of each religion fascinating and enjoyed
talking to people about them.
Years later in college, I met a man who fascinated
me. He had grown up Catholic but had turned away from the church though he
never turned away from God. He never pushed me, but shared his beliefs and
prayed for me. We were involved in Amway for a few years where I became
exposed to a church service for the first time. I loved the way they
talked about God and I loved how they were so secure in their beliefs without
pushing those beliefs on others. I didn't know it at the time, but my
husband was praying that I would feel the Lord tugging at my heart and accept
Jesus into my life. I did feel that pull to walk down that aisle and
accept Jesus, but I had that image stuck in my head and I didn't think it was
picturing me: a good girl with no "aha" transforming moment waiting for
her.
After a few years a woman came to my door asking if
I knew Jesus and if she could talk to me. I didn't know what religion she
was but I was fascinated by her peace and the strength of her faith. She
began studying with me out of the Bible. Some of the things she talked about
made logical sense to me. Some seemed to be an interpretation that I
didn't share as I read God's words. I brought God's words to my husband
who had never really studied the Bible before. Before too long we were
choosing a church to attend each Sunday. My husband hadn't been to church
in years! So you see, when God found me, he saved two lives! My
husband began to study the Bible and we began a life that was
Christ-centered.
As I grew in my faith, I began to see life
differently. It was no longer just a journey in which to have the most
fun. It was a time to share what I knew with others. It was a time to make
a difference! To notice the talents the Lord had given me and to use them
to further God's Kingdom.
I have a very unique perspective. I grew up
in an Atheist home and I knew what unbelievers think and need to hear about
Jesus. I also had been trained in speech communication so I understood how
this should be presented and I knew that it needed to be presented differently
to each of the souls the Lord created. This changed not only my outlook on
faith but my outlook on life and filled me with a purpose.
Many things have changed over the years that stem
directly from that day when God just made too much sense to me to deny
Him. My job changed. My outlook on life and purpose changed.
My children changed! Their education changed. My needs
changed. My mission changed. My family changed. They changed
in a gentle and slow moving way at first as God is a gentle Father. But
looking back on my life before I knew Jesus, I see a totally new creature in
Christ.
Even though there was no light shining down from
heaven...no instant change of life and purpose. I didn't go from rags to
riches. I didn't come from despair. I didn't immediately embrace all
God had to offer. God drastically changed this shy little Agnostic girl
into a bold advocate for God's Kingdom.
In His Service,
JoJo Tabares
http://www.ArtofEloquence.com